Life and all the other stuff

I'm feeling a tad fed up today.  I'm having a really bad time at work and am having to seek some proper advice which really sucks.  I'd love to go for a hair cut ha ha - I'm so fed up with not feeling good about my hair.  I know it's so much better than not having any and I am glad for what I have but my patience is running thin today and I'm just sitting on the pity pot, having a wallow.  At 2 o'clock I'm going to put on some slap and go out for a walk and enjoy this sunny afternoon.  Who knows it might just cheer me up enough to make a chocolate cake for my darling children.

Christmas in June

Had a really good day today.  At Christmas my brother-in-law gave me a spa day to share with my sister (the best sister in the whole wide world) and today we went had a lovely pampery, lazyish day at the spa.  Started with a foot ritual, then a swim - about an hour - how my health has improved. Then a warm room experience (it's actually called something Roman that I can't recall) very soothing though, followed by a thermal pedicure for me and facial for big sister.  We had a lovely lunch and then relaxed in the chill out room for an hour before showering and going home.  I feel so relaxed mmmmm.  I also had teal polish on my tootsies which my fashionistas (aka teenage girls) tell me is a very hot colour this summer.  So not only am I supporting Teal Toes but also being right on trend - very unusual for the frumpy middle aged, moody old women I am!

Happy Day!

Second three month check done and dusted.  Slightly lower CA125 and nothing to worry about!  Smiled all the way home and even kissed the Dog!

Uptight and Snappy

I'm sort of pleased this weekend is over - only two days until my second three month check - that will make six months out of chemo.  And yet, in the same breath I don't want to know, unless that is it's the news I want.  It's so close to the anniversary of my diagnosis that it all feels fairly horrible and I really don't want another summer like last year's.  Oh how these thoughts tumble and tangle round and around my poor achy head.  Plan A for this, Plan B for that, I know it will only tell me what's already there or not as the case may be.    My poor family having to put up with such an uptight and snappy person.

Oh, and I've got an appointment tomorrow to get some advice about my employment issues so it looks like a fun filled week - lucky me.

Birthday Madness

So .... Sunday came, the weather was fine (well sort of) and we had a grand old time celebrating Ben's 18th Birthday.  My beloved did his bit with the barbecue and much fun ensued.  I have decided to share the bottles between my neighbours recycling bins so that the binmen don't report me to AA.  These are my three children, Meg, Ben and Harrie! 

 
It was good to have all of my family together - it's been 18 months since we last met up - and there must be something in the water because, like buses one doesn't come along for ages then two turn up. I am talking about Babies!   David's niece is also going to have her first baby later this year so I'll be a great aunt twice over first in October and the next in December.  I knew I'd kept the duplo for a good reason.  So we had lots to celebrate.

The partying now has to stop because eldest child has A Levels starting next week and I'll have to start knitting again!

Meeting up

I had wonderful day on Thursday.  I met up with my friend Gaynor who I'd met via the Ovacome site.  We went to Trentham, drank gallons of coffee and pots of tea and had a good old chat.

There is very little that I can say has been good about my cancer journey but making new friends is one real bonus.

I smiled all the way home and can't wait to meet again.

Back to Work

This week was a landmark for me.  I went back to work.  Yes, me, cancer free, in remission but still shaky and a tad worried about life, the universe and everything, went back to work. The experience wasn't pleasant and I am still quite upset about it but I went back to work.  The welcome mat wasn't at the door, 'my' desk had been given to the newest person in the office and contents of 'my' desk had been unceremoniously dumped on my new desk, together with the last nine months of accumulated general dross.  I had been listed on the location board as a 'visitor' and a restructure is underway and guess what - I don't think my job will exist after July!  Oh and I've been taken off the payroll and I'll be paid by cheque!  What fun.

I'm feeling quite p****d off about it but having asked if I should write my hours for next week on the location board in the visitor section, and presented the pile of accumulated dross to my boss to sort out because 'I don't want to throw away anything that might be important and then having the audacity to ask what my role now is; there were one or two embarrassed glances and awkward silences there was something muttered about not wanting to stress me out and they weren't at all sure I'd even show up!  And we'll have a meeting with you soon to discuss what it is you'll be doing.  Hello, I've got a job description and contract and as far as I'm aware I didn't have my brain removed at the same time as my tumour (although us chemo brains do sometimes question this fact).  I just want my job, as it was when I went on sick leave - obviously with some catch up time and support, but my ability to do my job is, hopefully, as good as nine months ago.

Rant, rant and rage.

I'm not in again until Tuesday of next week by which time I'll have calmed down and thought about a strategy to deal with it all.

So much for welcome back it's good to see you!